How Emotionally Connected (Secure) Are You In Your Relationship? What is the secret ingredient that makes a relationship thrive?Dr. Sue Johnson, who founded EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy), the most researched couples therapy model, has studied this question extensively. EFT has a huge success rate. EFT works for 75% of couples! At Relationships Matter Austin, we use EFT in our work with couples. We also hold Hold Me Tight® Retreats a couple of times a year, where couples can receive intensive training and learn to reconnect. She has been able to distill the answer to this key question down to its bare essentials: What truly makes a relationship thrive and provides the key to long-lasting love is emotional responsiveness. This questionnaire comes from Dr. Sue Johnson’s book Hold Me Tight (2008). It looks at how Accessible, Responsive and Engaged you are with each other. These are the key qualities in a relationship that create connection and feeling bonded. This quiz has 15 short true/false questions. Examine the following statements and indicate whether you feel they are true or false about your partner. In order to receive the most accurate results, please answer each question as honestly as possible. I recommend taking this questionnaire twice. First, answer the questions about your partner, about how Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged your partner is with you. Second, answer the questions a second time, but this time, answer the questions about yourself. Answer the questions again, this time focusing on how Accessible, Responsive, and Engaged you are with your partner. If your answers show that you and your partner are completely accessible, responsive, and engaged, that would be impressive. Most people find that that is not the case. If you have areas for improvement, come to one of our Hold Me Tight Marriage Retreats or come in for EFT couples counseling. Successful marriage takes work, and we can help you strengthen your marriage. Fill out your first name and email address to get a copy of your quiz results emailed to you. First Name (optional) Email Address (optional) Subscribe me to your Relationship Resource Newsletter!From your viewpoint, is your partner accessible to you? (For questions, #1-5)1. I can get my partner’s attention easily. True False2. My partner shows me that I come first with him/her. True False3. My partner is easy to connect with emotionally. True False4. I am not feeling lonely or shut out in this relationship. True False5. I can share my deepest feelings with my partner. He/she will listen. True FalseFrom your viewpoint, is your partner responsive to you? (For questions, #6-10)6. If I need connection and comfort, he/she is there for me. True False7. My partner responds to signals that I need him/her to come close. True False8. I find I can lean on my partner when I am anxious or unsure. True False9. Even when we fight or disagree, I know that I am important to mypartner and we will find a way to come together. True False10. If I need reassurance about how important I am to my partner, I can getit. True FalseAre you positively emotionally engaged with each other? (For questions, #11-15)11. I can confide in my partner about almost anything. True False12. I feel very comfortable being close to, trusting my partner. True False13. I feel confident, even when we are apart, that we are connected to eachother. True False14. I know my partner cares about my joys, hurts, and fears. True False15. I feel safe enough to take emotional risks with my partner. True FalseTime is Up!